Being in love or as much out of it?

maut ko sirhane liye,
zindagi bhi dehleez par aa ruki hai,
aapni kismat haaton mein liye bathe hain,
sochte hain ab darwaaza kis taraf khul paayega...

when was the last time that a touch made u feel like the heavens were holding you. when u looked at the sunset with your eyes closed because it was just so magical being there, in that moment, you couldnt have asked for more. when was the last time you spoke like you knew there was nothing that needed to be said and you were silent, but everything was understood. when was the last time you knew she would cry, and she did and she fell in your arms like a baby would, not knowing what to say, what to do, but knowing that she was still in the right place holding onto you. do you remember the conversation that was so normal and still everytime you think of it, it brings tears to your eyes.... do u remember that moment that was so pure, that it is just so difficult to explain what it was about. do you remember that smile which was meant only for you. or that feeling that someone feels your presence above everyone else. do you remember those and a million others that make you smile and cry at the same time? and do u realise how close they are to your heart, they touch you each time they pass you by... when i remembered each of these i only smiled and cared with no pain. and i longed so much for these to come back again to me. to try and re-live every moment that had passed me by. and i realised everytime i tried to wake these up from inside of me, i was only shattering more and more dreams that lived within me. i understood that re-living that would mean killing every memory that i ever had... Asking every first to have a second..